Hi, Stepparents! I know that for me, it hasn’t always been easy to get support in my stepparenting role. And more accurately, it’s been downright challenging.
Most of the people in my world couldn’t relate or even fully understand what I was going through.
They didn’t know about the constant juggle I was experiencing. Not only the physical juggle but the emotional one as well. In addition to my stepparenting responsibilities, there was work, day-to-day essentials and doing something to keep my sanity.
The Key to Stepparenting Sanity
I realized over the years that keeping my sanity and even a bit of calm was the most important component that would make or break my day. I had to learn to be present if I was going to effectively take care of the many To Do’s on my list without starting World War III.
Learning how to find and stay connected to that calm was essential in relieving the many needless fights. Fights that started over tiny things, like washing your hands when you come home, and quickly turned into blow outs between my partner and me.
After the storm had settled and I had reflected on how and why things escalated so quickly to such a drastic point, I realized that there were moments where I was triggered or jumped to a conclusion and made an assumption.
Those things didn’t actually exist. They weren’t said or even implied, but I read them as such in the moment. I’m not saying that the misunderstanding only happened on my end, my partner contributed to things as well.
But, I focused on my end of things because that was the quickest path to getting results and lessening the chance of these situations happening again in the future.
Develop a Stepparent Sanity Routine
I started to develop a morning routine. It’s changed quite a bit throughout the years and now I’m able to be pretty fluid with it because I’m relatively in touch with what I need. But, in the beginning and over the years I tried a lot of different things.
The key for me was consistency and sticking with each one for a good while before moving on. I tried things like yoga, running, exercising, meditation, journaling, dancing, listening to music, reading, just to name a few.
I realized that creating sustainable habits was the key. Whatever I did to get myself to that calm place, was how I was able to find it. And by establishing that initial connection every day through healthy habits, I was able to re-connect to that grounded place throughout my day.
As I built these habits and utilized them regularly, that connection with feeling grounded strengthened. And I was able to access that deep ocean instead of flailing in the choppy waters at the surface.
My VIP clients also tell me that the key to stability and calm, is not waiting until something challenging takes place to find a way to calm down and maintain your cool.
Instead, the key is to create supportive routines and learn go-to tools that you can rely on for support during those inevitable moments.
If you’re struggling to maintain your cool due to anxiety, anger or fear, grab a Rapid Resolution Session with me to get unstuck and create more energy and resources for your stepparenting role. You can book that at synergisticsteparenting.com/rr.
I hope you found this episode helpful. Give these suggestions a try and reach out to let me know how it goes. I’d love to hear your feedback! Until next time, be well.
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